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black coffee...
sit your black arses down
let's open the black curtains so the black sun gets to shine in and welcome a bΓΆack morning to us all
490 replies omitted. See all
Samu πŸ” !KW2DbpWwls
why am i so bad at mario
Samu πŸ” !KW2DbpWwls
oo are you excited
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you can rent a house in saint louis for 700 a month with three bedrooms, two bathrooms, basement, full kitchen, living room, dining room, back patio
saint louis is really cool
i really wish i didn't have to move away from it

i wanted to bring jan to saint louis and get a place there and have yall come visit and go do cool saint louis things but now im in michigan for some reason and idk what im gonna do in march
i wish i could be adopted as a rika meido but sadly i never got offered it like the others
and jans folks don't want me

im sure i'll figure something out
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Well I think I was acting kind of unstable around that time too, so they were probably thinking anyone I was making friends with was unsavory or something
We've worked out a payment method for the property taxes though, so we're gonna be fine as long as we follow the plan and keep paying on time.
Honestly we don't have any extra rooms, my sisters share a room as is, though I wouldn't mind sharing my room and bed if everyone else was alright with it.
It's not a very big room but I have a TV and a little ikea dresser and a twin size bed.
The room barely fits that stuff but I've rearranged it to make more room a few times.
I'm hopeful!
This friend is an old one from high school and our relationship kind of soured and we drifted apart for like seven years.
But we've been talking a bit recently and he seems really driven, almost desperate, to get out of his parents' place.
Renting anywhere in Toronto as a single person without a job paying like twenty an hour is almost impossible though, so it seems he came to the same conclusion I did: find a friend and move out.
I'm still a little cautious around him but I think I can rely on that determination he's got to get away from his parents.

It would be kind of nice to not be around so many people at home though. I'm a bit anxious about having to consistently maintain income to support rent and sustenance; I get that's just a normal element of adult living, but man, I am bad at being a normal human bean.
There's some real positives and moral gains to moving out but it's also a pretty intense experience I don't really have any ... well, experience with.
So my thoughts on it are all over the place, hah hah.
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i'd be more than happy to share your room
as long as you tone down the drinking a notch and don't be doin any hard drugs around me
that stuff makes me uncomfortable

and even if you have payment arrangements worked out, the extra income couldn't hurt
i could throw down some amount per month and take some burden off of you, make the household finances slightly more comfortable

im just saying this stuff in a daydream sense right now
i know better than to get my hopes up with actual plans
Samu πŸ” !KW2DbpWwls
i see i see i bet it’ll be fun!
what would you know about fun, huh??
Also if I move out I wouldn't get to see my cat as much and that's a depressing thought.
Samu πŸ” !KW2DbpWwls
i recently invented fun
all previously seeming instances of amusement are just fever dreams
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local techbro reinvents fun
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you'll have to show me this "fun time" sometime then
i'd like to experience it firsthand
Samu πŸ” !KW2DbpWwls
damn moon you are coming on hard tonight
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I'd be more than happy to control myself if anyone actually got on my case for the drinking I bet.
Guess they're just glad I'm not as bad as I used to be or something but I don't get much shit anymore. Or maybe they're just tired and don't want to talk about it anymore.

But what I want isn't what matters most, it's not my house after all. I don't really want to live with my family either, but kind of have to with the current financial burden.

Also, I haven't done any drugs other than alcohol since New Year's.

Dreaming aside we should meet up again sometime. I want to see you again.
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Not the only one coming hard tonight
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water you gonna do about it

good on you for not touching that stuff since new years
keep it up, im proud of you
You can Dewβ„’ it Jan
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[email protected]

Im back from my first tano meetup.
Hopefully I can hang out with people from /moe/ soon.
who did you meet
[email protected]
Notso and lv
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what did you do
i like those two
i hope yall had fun
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thanks though I don't think it really changed much in the end
just means I'm not taking quite as much damage and still doing what I do

what you mean dew it

I'd like to meet LV he seems nice
problem is neither of us can understand each other so there's a lot of WHAT and HUH and COME AGAIN
[email protected]
We were going to go to a concert (literally the reason they came up here), but it sold out and it turbs out that they didn't buy tickets a head of time.
So we wnt to some record stores and then went to an arcade and stayed for like five hours.
We also went out for italian beef.
what did yall play at the arcade
[email protected]
I played deathsmiles, the grid, lucky and wild, area 51, time crisis, some starwars xwing piloting game from like 1990, some basketball thing, some football thing by the same company, metal slug 6, snk versus capcom 2000, snk versus capcom 2001, gauntlet,
We were going to play some relatively recent gradius game but the scond time the credit button was pushed we got an error in Japanese about the coin thing not working
Oh and the three stooges game which was really shitty
And I think that's it
[email protected]
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I needed that picture so much
thank youuuuuuu
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I thought you'd like that
here's the og link
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You already know what I like
Only slightly scary.
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yeah kind of
I just see things and think of who'd like those things
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hello ??
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I hope you get the help you need tonight.
I'm about to go out and fucking get destroyed
prob play some more final fantasy tactics
game trips me out fr
I remember this shit when I was 12, lmao
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you should slow down
or at least make an effort to
id like to see you stop drinking so we can see your good side more often
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Tomorrow yeah.
Even drinking is on a schedule for me.
bust busy bee
lol there's bust right here in this pic I posted
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Samu !KW2DbpWwls
hot hot hottt
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Nothing comes, nothing goes.
Nothing arises, nothing subsides.
There are no similarities. There are no differences.
There is no duality. There is no non-duality.
Kirara πŸ„
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good morning kirara
Kirara πŸ„
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herro mista moon
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i dont see any mistas around here
did you bonk your head again
mistah tsukeemoto
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there's not really a good gender neutral title there huh
wikipedia says mx or misc
mx with the x being a wildcard and pronounced mix, but i don't like the connotations of having it pronounced as mix
misc for miscellus, meaning mixed, so same deal
and misc ____ sounds kinda dumb
and then there's "ind" which doesn't even ahve any of the same phonetics

we should come up with a new one
Kirara πŸ„
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oh, right. that makes sense.

well, there's mister and mistress, and i know that's different connotations
but what about like mistrum, mistra plural
it's very hard to differentiate the sound from mister there though.

anyway, good morning! gonna have a grapefruit breakfast?
Kirara πŸ„
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nothin special for breakfast!
what about you
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just a kratom breakfast for me
i have to slow my brain down so i can do normal people things
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Here's a dumb clip I made just now
Always practise your reaction time /moo/~
Otherwise you'll die pathetically~
Kirara πŸ„
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that's not a breakfast!
yeah, i wish i had a grapefruit
Talesof !NuKeSlvmWE
good morning kirara and pals
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1 more dumbass clip that nobody will look at before I peace
I aced this round like a savage
and my aim was still bad lmfao
Kirara πŸ„
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garfield and friends

you should order supermarket delivery and only ask for a single grapefruit
Talesof !NuKeSlvmWE
Kirara πŸ„
story-wise it kind of makes sense
pokeUK did brexit and everything got fucked up so they just don't have access to most of the things everyone else in the developed world does
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Talesof !NuKeSlvmWE
removing super training after gen 6 actually does burn me a bit
they took away the thing that made EV training actually enjoyable.
a mini-game that lets you EV-train your pokemon without fighting the same type of pokemon over and over.
Kirara πŸ„
what's super training
Talesof !NuKeSlvmWE
if you're unfamiliar with EV-training, it's for minmaxing pokemon for competitive play.
Kirara πŸ„
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Kirara πŸ„
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oh, ton, did that leak include when the characters are goin up
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it's really hard to view myself objectively when assessing my potential value for something ive been contemplating a lot
i need some external opinion but i don't think i can ask yall and get the honest answers i need
is there some other approach for objectification
Kirara πŸ„
people usually go to therapists for stuff like that i think
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a therapist would only know what i tell them
for this something i would need someone who's experienced enough of me to know my flaws well

i know some of my flaws and some of my strengths, but then there are other traits that are going to be situational things
i would need to know whether the things which i am concerned about are actually interpersonal weak points or whether they're insecurities based on the criticisms ive had from my previous relationship
particularly as it relates to a relationship going forward
due to my isolation, i don't quite have the robust social experience to determine for myself

rather, not from my isolation but from my eccentricity
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Any rejection is just redirection~
its a safe assumption theyre goijg up when legfest happens which if i tecall correctly is tonight
Kirara πŸ„
oh sweet
11 pm est specifically i believe
Kirara πŸ„
I'm not sure that kind of objectivity is possible
knowing you that well would inevitably come with attachments
which would bias the observer

wow ill be asleep
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yes, that's my concern
the best i could get i think is to have someone who's situationally poised to provide their own feelings on the matter

take my financial situation for instance
i think im really disadvantaged in terms of finding a serious relationship given that im extremely unsuccessful by most social standards
i've lost my bank account and my credit, i have unsteady workflow and no savings, i have debt to the IRS
im plagued with a lot of functional issues that prevent me from going back to school

there are certain types of relationships which those things wouldn't interfere with so much, other people in a similar socioeconomic condition for instance and combined resources makes cohabitat more stable. but their reasons for being in the same socioeconomic condition might be different and we might have other incompatibilities, like my high functioning behaviors and ADD and high academic aptitude and the work im doing in mathematics which i don't get paid for, and those things matter to me

there are people who would align with me more on that level but are in higher socioeconomic conditions and have life stability, people who didn't slip through the cracks of public education and child protective services and left unable to function properly
to those people, there might be really good connectivity emotionally and mentally but my financial conditions and some of the downsides of my poor upbringing like malnutrition and fragile bones and stuff makes me into a big pile of red flags that doesn't mesh well with their life goals and objectives, and im not stable enough to be entering into parenthood under their standards as i have a lot of emotional distress and financial instability

i don't know the extent to which those examples, or other analogous examples, are more my own insecurities or are particularly valid for my situations specifically
the best thing i could probably do is, for the latter example, ask someone like rika. she is high functioning an
high functioning and has ADD and has the same requirement i do for high information processing volume, but she's a lot more stable and well equipped for life's goals
so she would have the kind of positioning to understand that perspective and knows me well enough to offer some objective input there

i don't particularly want to pose that question to a friend though because it sounds too much like im suggesting something that im not and it might lead to an uncomfortable situation for either or both parties
so it's very difficult to get the type of feedback im looking for. there's bias if i assess it myself, bias if i ask you guys, compromise if i ask someone in that position, and not enough information to make informed comments if i use a therapist

that was really long sorry
it's just been on my mind a lot, trying to sort my life out
it's why ive been thinking of going back to school, just that it would put me in slightly better social opinion
but i don't think it would actually help me directly at all
liked retweeted shared on discord
what a nerd
Kirara πŸ„
yeah i can see what you mean
that's good. at least im able to communicate clearly now.
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what's with all these cynical titles with rhetorical questions
i can't take it seriously

none of these look any good
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hello ??
they all left
it's all your fault
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Some of those sound like tabloid headlines

it doesn't seem very professional to me
maybe im just too anal about that stuff
hematologists are weird
i like blood though
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Lmaoing at this one
It sounds so outraged
you forgot the comma
that one doesn't even make sense to me
im not sure if the "so what" is supposed to be like
"oh, you have double hit lymphoma? so what? we can treat that easily"
i don't really get what it's supposed to mean
or is it "who cares drama queen"
>you have a deadly blood cancer? haha keep cryin, drama queen
i suppose you want me to do something about it too, huh?
sure, sure, can't handle your own problems so you gotta waste taxpayer money to see a hematologist-oncologist
boooo hooo my blood is mutated waaa come help me doc
well i have things to do too, you know? my kid has a soccer game tonight
why should i help you?
I love that they're all in capslock too
Makes it so much more aggressive
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Guys I'm injured
Now how do I get out of jured
turn right, head down the hallway third flight of stairs, go up two floors, head left. there is a balcony
inspect balcony
it is a way out
>>707418 β†’
>>707418 β†’
>>707418 β†’

making a new one a little early
Heyo moe
whatcha upto?
cmooooon you nerd
follow da rurus!